Chief Keef Isn’t a Menace to Society and He’s Not Going to Slap Katy Perry; Calm Down

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    Rapper Chief Keef has done it again. After being arrested in Atlanta for smoking marijuana in his hotel room in front of security, he got into a Twitter beef with Katy Perry.

    If you’re not familiar with this part of the Chief Keef story, pop singer Katy Perry said of the rapper’s latest song, “I Hate Being Sober” featuring 50 Cent and Wiz Khalifa, “Just heard a new song on the radio called ‘I hate being sober’ I now have serious doubt for the world..”

    When he heard about the tweet, Chief Keef, quite expectedly, responded “”Dat b*tch Katy Perry Can Suck Skin Off Of my Di—.” He followed that up with, “Ill Smack the s–t out her.”

    And the hand wringing began. But did we really not see this coming?

    I want to ask all of you out there condescendingly chiding Chief Keep a question. Do you remember when you were 17? Remember all the incomprehensibly stupid, narcissistic and impulsive things you did? Don’t act like you never threatened anyone’s life. You did.

    Now imagine, as that awful, tedious, self-involved 17-year-old self, that you’re an entertainer with a reputation for being a thug that’s made you millions of dollars and a crew of people who depend on you and that thug reputation to make their money. You have an album that’s been described as a “minstrel show” and you rose to fame on the back of a song whose central theme is “that’s that sh*t I don’t like.” Let’s also imagine that you may or may not have killed a guy.

    Now imagine some white woman – a pop singer, no less – insulting a song you made called “I Hate Being Sober.” How would you react?

    You would be furious. You would fly to Twitter and threaten to slap the sh—out of her, right? You would probably diss her on a song, maybe call her old or say you were gonna shoot her or sell her into white slavery in Bahrain.

    I’m genuinely surprised ol’ Chief didn’t post a picture of himself on Instagram with a shotgun or an AK-47 or something equally likely to violate his probation for the umpteenth time.

    The moral of the story is that 17 year olds say stupid things, especially when they’re rappers, especially when they’ve got binders full of juvenile detention records. Remember that other time when the 17-year-old with little to no parental supervision, no father figure and a bunch of money did something stupid? I bet you can think of one.

    Perry also apologized to the Keef, writing:

    “Mr. Keef! I’m sorry if I offended you. I heard a lot of people guesting on the song & didn’t even know it was you in particular. Actually…”

    She even went on to pay him a compliment.

    “I’m a fan of your ‘Don’t Like’ video tbh,” she said in a follow-up tweet. “I was really just having a general opinion on our generations desire to be constantly intoxicated.”

    Chief Keef accepted the apology, writing, “@katyperry Oh Im Sorry Too Then.”

    He followed that up by erasing the tweet, making a completely inappropriate reference to the mother of Reggie Bush’s child and then erasing that tweet. Beccause, you know, he’s 17.

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